Recycling

We all know about recycling these days, the kind where we separate the soda cans and the milk jugs from the rest of the trash. But there’s another sense of the word. Recycle also means simply “to pass through a cycle again”. Lather, rinse, repeat.

This week I’ll cycle again through the check up and blood test ritual. I’ve already started with the nervous stomach and the fervent prayers. Then comes the semi-sleepless night before. There’s the catch in my throat as I walk into the cancer center once again. When I see the scarf-covered heads and pale faces, I remember the many treatments and surgeries in that building.

There’s the prick and vials of the blood test. It’s followed by the hour-long wait, where I drink bad coffee from the cafe and try to distract myself by working on my laptop.

A nurse at the door calls my name and ushers me into a bland room. It’s only after my very wonderful and very cheerful doctor arrives and logs into the computer that I get the results.

Please pray for me this week, as I go through all of this again. Though my odds staying in remission get better with every passing month, the cycle of holding my breath for results never seems to get easier. As I get healthier, there seems to be more at stake in getting sick again.

A good result on Wednesday means that my doc will clear me for a trip to Kenya this summer. It has been my prayer since my first stay in the hospital that I would get to be with my dear friends in Kilgoris again. (www.thekilgorisproject.com) My heart may just explode with joy and thanks when that happens.

 

Caren

~ by jonmccormack on March 23, 2009.